I remember when I first read a review of Carter II when the reviewer said Lil Wayne was the future. I was in disbelief (still a underground hip hop head) then I started bumpin Shooter and Mo Fire and now Lil Wayne is really changing the face of music. The man just performed (rapped in autotune) at the Country Music Awards, and this Hot Revolver is the future of music in several ways. All from a 5'1 drug addict who looks like a goblin.
Strange times, but this track is RIDICULOUS.
Back to Arizona mode, getting ready for more shows and putting this all together into something complete. Strange how things keep shifting, it's become the story of a life.
"Boy you got a problem, and you ain't fooling no one but yourself,
you're like a hot revolver, and you ain't killing no one but yourself."
Yep, thats about right.
A year ago at this time I was still majorly distraught over my roommate who killed himself during the summer and I'd just started making tracks with my homie Carnegie and we we're trying to pick a name for our group, if we chose to pursue one. I was ready to leave New York because I couldn't find real work, I was very depressed over the summer events, and I hadn't seen sunlight in weeks.
It's crazy how things are so different, from living in my car and on basement floors in AZ to back to NY meeting with labels for Silver Medallion a year later. I hope JB would be proud. I remember trying to convince him not to take his job offer and to move to San Fran or NY and just live poor and write books and smoke cigarettes all day and night. I wish he'd listened, but now I feel its my duty to really convince people to give up their formulated ideals and come along for the ride, what's a year of your life to say you at least tried?
"Boy you got a problem, and you ain't fooling no one but yourself,
you're like a hot revolver, and you ain't killing no one but yourself."
Not sure where I'm at anymore, been thinking about my man a lot, wondering if I'd have been able to make it as far if I didn't have his name tattooed on my arm reminding me every day of him telling me what I could be. They say once you hit 25 you've reached the peak of your mental capacity, and what you've learned thus far forms the framework for where you can go the rest of your life. I've stopped learning, stopped reading, stopped tv, stopped absorbing all traditional knowledge, I just write songs now, and I'm beginning to see I'm ending up a far different person than I imagined I'd become. I no longer expect to be the smartest in the room, but rather the most connected to the larger consciousness, and it seems I no longer know myself now that that's the case. Just a product of the world around me, but at least not in the bad sense.
Selah.
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